Story of the day (My feelings as of recent actually) 

The feelings I can never say to anyone else without the fear of being judged…and you’re the only one I will open up to about how I truly feel inside and cry on your shoulder…

I’ve been feeling pretty down lately  because of stress and all the new unfamiliar faces of smart people around me, and with parents who complicate matters by pushing me to be impossibly as good as those ultra smart and hardworking people (when I never was even half as good as they were)…

I didn’t know how I should approach anyone to tell them how uncertain and afraid I am inside…it kills me every minute to just bottle everything inside…When I approach my parents, I get bitten at anyway. When I approach my schoolmates, I fear they would gossip and tell everyone else and judge me for being some kind of coward who’s afraid of facing reality…

I mean. Junior College life hasn’t even began for me (probably in 3 days actually) and I’m already nervous and jittery inside. Outside I seem so calm and okay but the truth is I just need someone to be here for me.

And that’s when I was with you. 

On the bus home. Sitting in the back of the second deck. I just couldn’t bear it anymore. I just got sensitive at the moment and broke down in tears…

You were there to hug me and wipe away my tears…Stroked my hair and tried to calm me down as I wept on your shoulder, feeling so afraid inside…

I felt glad you were there, rather than to be all alone in such moments of time…

Gently kissing my forehead, you reassured me that you would never ever leave me and always be here by my side…as I openly spoke of my sorrows without holding back my feelings.I guess there really isn’t anyone except you whom I can actually wholeheartedly place my trust in and openly express my emotions…
I’ll never let go of your hand. 

Thank you for being such a caring boyfriend. I love you. 
-Hyun Jae 

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